Rough/Tough Days ahead......Boxty fearful (for the phóca)..

Following upon Omar's "good oul' day out" at nuptial festivities over the weekend, the spectre of even worse looms over my ageing head in forthcoming days.
A family wedding, oddly encompassing, at a stretch, both sides of the Boxty clan, takes place at the weekend in Carton House, somewhere in Kildare..
Initial, querulous enquiries by the Boxman, indicate that this is a Grade 1 gaff, and early indications are that pints will exceed €6 at least....

Compounding my misery is the fact that my brother and his wife are coming from NYC to us for about 10 days...This is as sound as a brown pound with me, but when "She" says "We'll cover them for the hotel for the night" tore the arxe out of it......If that was bad, hold on..
Her brother and wife are coming from Australia, giving a few days in the West (Guess where?) and in the spirit of our trip there earlier in the year, they being the full solid finest, "We'll see them right as well"..

It gets worse....Boxty has been buttonholed by both males to see Croak Park when there's a big crowd..Dubs V Cork might just do..I have 6 tickets under control at the moment, but obviously no, nor no sign, of shekels...sigh!!!

Capping it all, Junior Boxty 1, residing in Carlow, is having a tour-de-force BBQ for the visitors on the Saturday, complete with plaintive whinge (Fook Boxty, we'll need a rake of drink, them uncles of mine...).......It gets worse..the only suit I have is a cast-off from the Bro, she's fooked that out, you can't wear that..
Luckily The Crane, upon a nod, procured a suitable replacement "on appro" at the market in Mullan for around the €40 mark......

I haven't gotten to household exps, ensemble for W/O, matching handbags (comb, lippy, fags but no money) shoes..

Suggestions for curtailing costs are welcome...Any ideas that might slash a projected €5k. wipeout to hopefully break-even are welcomed...

Yours despairingly, Boxty.

Seems like somewhat of a conundrum by all counts. From a fund raising perspective the upcoming fleadh still presents numerous opportunities – semi frozen bottles of spring water at €3 each looks to be the best bet at the moment.



However I suspect that what you have in mind is something that can limit the outgoings on the days in question. I’m also suspecting that the primary objective here would be to come with a mechanism that would be cash positive for boxty and cash negative for the “cozs” without it being apparent that Boxty is anything other than the host with the most.



A possible option here is to develop a scheme with a third party (trusted by Boxty) but unknown to all other parties. I recall you mentioning chopping boards and St Brigids crosses before – in the event that these can be extracted from shed, perhaps nail a brigids cross to a piece of wood – splash on a bit of Ronseal and knock out a quick family moto “Ní neart go cur re chéile is always a good generic one. Now we have a treasured souvenir of the clan boxty reunion - €150 a pop at a stretch.



I suggest that aforementioned friend set up an “arty stall” outside Carton house – When Boxty spots this – he bounds across with unbridled joy and buys the first one – saying that there could be no more fitting momentum of a great and wonderful Clann Reunion. Then hope that the posse follow suit. – “stall owner” would probably have to get his 20% but ask him to fund diesel for van and Ronseal

A Turf Share Field.
Knowing you it wouldn't even be your field but belong to the "nearest and dearest" of the next parish.
Can sell 52 shares (one per week of year)
Economically viable (for you)
First come first served limited option only
Environmentally friendly (the buzz word of the 21st century)

Think of all the side benefits
hire of tractor and trailer say €200 a load/day
Fuel extra (all supply above empty)
Can do self catering or full board option when turf share "owner" turns up

I know its a long term investment but you will get the initial turf share sign on fee.
even if you sell at €100 a share there is €5200 back allows you an extra 200 to splash on the War office to really get in the good books.

Kicking part you get that €5200 every year for as long as you run this environmentally friendly project and possibly some government grant available now that the greens are in office

Thanks guys for input so far...the nucleus of a plan is hatching.. On the down side, "She" wants the beard removed for the occasion..FFS.

Seed capital to be provided by steaming into Winnie Dixie in tonights 6.10 at Windsor...4/1 at this juncture.**

** Info gathered from an esteemed punter/poster elsewhere and I can't find the tipping thread, too busy in fact to look....

Boxty - you gotta get the two men folk out on the lash as soon as they arrive. After 5/6 pints (warm up) turn the conversation to .. those b*****d Lehman brothers. Your [inconsequential] lump sum, the Post Office savings, Credit Union bobs - everything! But then you drop the piece de resistance .... every penny the War Office had, all she had in the world.

Your line - at this point - sniffing into pint .... 'Now lads say nothing - she knows nothing of the carnage. Jaysus she hasn't a bean left - but I tell her they are performing well. It'd break her heart. Every week is a struggle. Now lads - promise me mum's the word! Say nothing to her - act normal. Her wish is my command. But jaysus this Carton thing is breaking us to be honest. But whist - say nothing. 3 more creamy pints there bartender. Now what about Leitrim's chances in 2011?'

Trust me B!

Oh ......... a liberal sprinkling of terms such as MABS, Citizens Advice Bureau and moneylenders will help swing the deal before you drop the three magic words here .......... Community Welfare Officer!

sorry i know that war office as well those words mean nothing

Ah Jaysus lads, that's tearing the arxe out of it altogether. The Crane is currently "superimposing" images of Fenagh Abbey onto circular wooden commemorative plaques for the occasion. This is expensive enough, an ash tree had to be cut, no harm, there's plenty of them around (not one of mine I might add).
The plaques got a run through a drying kiln (not mine either) and Dan the Dauber lashed on a 1st coat of some sort of lacquer.
The technically gifted Crane took it from there and Dauber will be back in the morning** for another blast of lacquer. I'm unable to copy the photo being used because the "paste" yoke on this appears airlocked...I've rattled out 50 of these and have enough timber left for about 20 more. I'm looking for some image that would appeal to the Carlow group (Browneshill Dolmen appears to be a big rock) but it will have to do.

The bro the Yank will doubtless be good for a dozen or so to kick it off at say €50 a pop, so taking a total of 70 X €50 should rattle up €3.5k.

€500 from Winnie Dixie added to this has the back broke in it thank God...

I omitted to add that a small bottle of poitín will be free with every purchase (slightly diluted for safety sake).

**The Dauber might not appear till the afternoon as rumours are flying that he's "well rattled" below in the village....

The brother was having a nostalgic root out in the sheds this morning when he discovered the plaques and other assorted paraphernalia. His curiosity was naturally piqued and when faced for an explanation, I blurted out "I'm very concerned by the plight of poorer people the world over and trying to raise a few quid for them"..
Furiously ad-libbing, I rambled on about my ambition to raise €5k over the weekend toward "famine relief" without being overly specific.

He threw his arms around me and tearfully stammered about how proud our late parents would have been of me...
Pouncing on a breaking ball faster than Eddie Brennan, I then outlined my additional plan for the w/end toward this fund raiser (The Pakie & Stan Appeal)..

A "Renewing Rural Roots" weekend is the prize for the winner of the €10 per ticket draw...Events to include are fishing, snare-setting, creel-making, mini-courses in thatching, jet-skiing, butter churning, cross-making and other assorted rustic pursuits....

Who knows, he might even win it himself. I could then tell him he's having it.........

On a slightly negative note, I "had" to tax the car today fearing a long voyage into unknown territory. Fooking hell, €173 for the quarter. I'd been getting the local Sgt. to sign the oul' white form off and on to keep her "somewhat right" but this is daylight robbery...The Grump in the tax office was, I thought, suspicious..
It doesn't do any more MPG when taxed does it Do all ye' lads subscribe to this scam or what's the norm with ye'????

Boxty, Serious business opportunity lost over the last week.. Apparently a serious lack of gift stalls around the Fleadh. Met some yanks who went to the town with the idea of buying some gifts for the people back in the US and came back empty handed!! If we could have laid our hands on a few cheap boudhrans and a t-shirt making machine we could've cleaned up..

Just after a tour and few sneaky porters
Pubs still packed and drink prices still rounded up by 20% - but at this stage more money to be made in the last of the burgers and curry chips than t-shirts.
As a young clean cut Donegal garda advised me- Theres a rake of clousters on the rampage tonight. still not sure wether he was talking about the mob or me.

OMAR wrote:Just after a tour and few sneaky porters
Pubs still packed and drink prices still rounded up by 20% - but at this stage more money to be made in the last of the burgers and curry chips than t-shirts.
As a young clean cut Donegal garda advised me- Theres a rake of clousters on the rampage tonight. still not sure wether he was talking about the mob or me.

Any truth that several establishments around the town are milking the last of the Fleadh before closing their doors for good?

Wedding report...Carton House last w/end...
A 6 man team arrived in the village of Clane around the 1pm mark for a 1.30 wedding..Scoops in the adjacent Manzers? were the order of the day..

1.20 women depart for church, 20mtrs...
1.55 men surreptiosly sneak in.....no bride as yet...
2.10 elderly padre approaches groom to announce in silent tones "I'm getting my lunch, I'll be back around 3.00pm if she's up for it"
2.12 word reaches Boxty entourage (male) of delay...evacuation order implemented H&S regulations...
2.13 3XHeino summoned in Manzers...lovely...
2.15 5 or 7 males (known to Boxty join group)
2.32 10 X Heinos summoned (served)
2.56 9 X Heinos summoned (served) .....1 coward.
3.17 9 X Heinos summoned (served)..
3.40 Approach church......Bride&Groom meet on church steps, much kissing etc.,...

The rest of the day was a riot.....