Larry Reilly Classic!

Why Larry Reilly is Better than Pele or Maradona.



The Original.......

>>People thought Pele was great because he played for Brazil in
the World Cup when he was seventeen. When Larry was seventeen he was
playing with Knockbride minors, Knockbride junior B’s, the odd senior
game, St. Brigids u21’s, Bailieborough schools u18’s, the Cavan
Vocational schools team, AND the Cavan Minors.

>>Maradona may have used the hand of God to beat England, but
only Larry could get away with hoping the ball twice and scoring the
equalising point in an Ulster final.

>>Pele and Maradona would run the length of the field, go around
every opposition player including the goalkeeper and tap it into the
empty net, Larry just runs to the corner and scores from there.

>>Pele needed to advertise viagra to turn people on. Larry Reilly just has to play football.

>>Because there’s only one great team play in blue and white, and it’s not Argentina.

>>In Brazil there’s a special edition toilet paper called ‘Pele’.
There was going to be a toilet paper called ‘Larry’, but Larry Reilly
doesn’t take crap from anyone.

>>Pele and Maradona had some of the world’s greatest ever players playing alongside them. Who had Larry?

>>I’ve never seen Pele bust through two Aussie Rules players and come out with the ball.

>>If Larry was a bullock, you’d say, ” he’s winthered well!”

>>Pele and Maadona played in some of the biggest and finest
stadiums in the world, but you’d never see them scoring 1-8 against
Killagarry of a winters evenin’.

>>Larry Reilly defies physics, no man weighing fifteen stone could be that fast.

>>There’d be no point in ringing Maradona if you had a pipe leaking .

>>Larry Reilly says shin gaurds are for babies.

>>Pele and Maradona may have come up against defenders from every
corner of the world but did they ever skin Francie Bellew?...Larry sure
did.

>>You always hear players being branded ‘the new Maradona’, or
‘the new Pele’. You’ll never hear anyone being called ‘the new Larry’.
You know why?...Because there’ll only ever be one Larry Reilly

Larry Reilly rents videos and never rewinds them, ever.

When Larry Reilly was a child, he made his mother finish his vegetables.

If you wake up in the morning, it's because Larry Reilly spared your life.

Larry Reilly won the Tour de France on a unicycle to prove to Lance Armstrong it wasn't a big deal.

Every day is the longest day of Larry Reillys life. For terrorists, the shortest.

What colour is Larry Reillys blood? Trick question. Larry Reilly does not bleed.

Larry Reilly once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.

When Larry Reilly stares into the sun, the sun flinches.

If it tastes like chicken, looks like chicken, and feels like chicken, but Larry Reilly says its beef. Then it's beef.

James Bond has a license to kill. Larry Reilly don't need any licenses.

Larry Reilly' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Larry Reilly.

1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Larry Reilly. Sounds like a fair fight.

Larry Reilly once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.

You can lead a horse to water. Larry Reilly can make him drink.

always loved those.you dont happen to know the lad who claims to have made them up?

Dougal wrote:always loved those.you dont happen to know the lad who claims to have made them up?

Most of them were originally Chuck Norris jokes - the original Larry ones are Jonsmith's finest!

ps We will be expecting a private audience with Larry when we venture up to support our adopted team!

Is it true that when Larry Reilly sprints the Earth spins quicker?

bald eagle wrote:Is it true that when Larry Reilly sprints the Earth spins quicker?

Of course, and when he does push ups he stays still and the earth moves up and down. In other news it emerged today that superman wears a pair of Larry Reilly PJs and that Larry Reilly is the reason that Wally is hiding..

The lad that made up the pele mardonna is a cousin of mine got a job writing for bananareel and is just after finishing his masters!